I’ve Moved to a New URL!!!

Well since I have gotten pretty annoyed with the mass amounts of limitation I have with a free WordPress account I have registered a new domain and I have moved everything including your comments to the new site.  The design is pretty slick and I spent hours getting it all ready to go.  Head over and check it out!

http://thesearchforhappiness.com

So as you can see the new URL is pretty much the same but without the .wordpress in it.  I will be removing all my posts from here in a few days.  See you on the new site!  Leave some feedback and tell me what you think about it!

My First Kiss

Everyone remembers their first kiss, good, bad or in my case very awkward.  I have come to accept the fact that nothing in my life comes naturally or very easy, but are presented to me through random and/or weird events.  My first kiss was no exception this is.

The story begins in the summer, with me going on a date with a girl I worked with.  She was 3 years older than I was and had asked me out via a note that contained her number, while at work one day.  I was kind of shocked, because a girl had never come up to me and done anything like that before.  The next day I gave her a call to set up a time when we could go out on our date.  We had the date a few days after the phone call, which actually went very well.  So well in fact, that a kiss was in order at the end of the night.

Now, let me explain one thing.  I didn’t have a drivers license back then, she did, but she couldn’t drive that night because she had hit something with her car and it was being repaired.  So since neither of us could drive that night, her step-dad volunteered to come and pick me up and drive us to where we were going for the night.

Eventually the time came when we pulled into my driveway and it was time to say goodnight.  I got out of the car and so did she.  We stood in front of the the car talking for a bit and then the big moment happened, the kiss goodnight.  I wasn’t expecting anything to happen except a hug and a see you again soon, but things played out much differently.  We said our goodnights and when I went in for the hug she pushed me back against the hood of the car and started kissing me.  This would have been a good story in it’s own, but what makes it great, is that her step-dad was in the drivers seat watching all of this happen on the hood of his band new SUV.

Follow me on Twitter!

I know it sounds a bit stalkerish to those that don’t use Twitter, but following someone isn’t a bad thing… on Twitter at least.  Being a bit of a geek, I try out new upcoming sites on the internet all the time.  For example, I was on Facebook before it was cool and the same goes for Twitter.  I have my personal accounts, but I decided to make a new one for this blog, so my identity would remain unknown.

Twitter is all about interaction with others, so make an account and send me a tweet!  I’d love to hear your thoughts and/or any ideas for posts.  Who knows, we may even become internet friends… but not the creepy kind.

http://twitter.com/Search4Hapiness

Rejected!!

Over the years I have been rejected many times and in many different ways.  Some of these ways include the fake email address or phone number, not returning my calls (that is if they gave me their correct phone number), to the not so subtle, telling me they will go on a date and then not bothering to show up.  As I was driving home last night with my friend and his wife, we were talking about a lot of the random rejection stories I have.  One especially made my friend laugh really hard and he insisted that I post it on here, so here it is.  Maybe he found it funnier than it actually is, because he knows exactly who I am talking about.  Funny or not, here it is.

One night I was spending some time with a girl I knew, who recently had dated one of my friends and were talking about our dating lives.  We were talking for a quite a while, when it got to a point where I knew she thought I was interested in her (I wasn’t interested in her like that at all).  I mean what do you do with that?  “Hey can we stop for a second?  Before we continue this conversation, can I inform you that I am not interested in dating you at all?  I know you may think I am, but I am not”.  Yeeah… No.  That would go over like a lead balloon.  Also, if you said that, you are going to make yourself look like a complete fool.  But as fate would have it, she decided she would tell me that in no way was she ever going to be interested in me. This is how it went…

Girl: You know what?  I don’t think you and I would ever work out… ever

Me: Um, ok I’ll play along… Why is that?

Girl: You don’t have enough color to you.

Me: What do you mean not enough color?  I have no idea what you are talking about. (At this point I was wondering if I was suppose to look like a multicolored Unicorn or something like that)

Girl: You know, you aren’t black or brown.

Me: Ahh I got it now… Wait… You aren’t black or brown, you are white like I am.  Why did you bring this up?  I have no idea where that came from.

Girl: Well that is just the way it goes, so it’s just too bad.

Well as you can imagine, I was super confused and I was out of there pretty quick.  Not once did I ever mention me and her and the possibility of having a relationship, or even going on a date.  Also I thought it was out of line for her to bring race into it.  I mean if you are nice person it shouldn’t really matter.  Funny thing about this is, she married the whitest guy you have ever met about 2 months later.  The guy listens to heavy metal and drives a pick-up truck.  Guess she really didn’t care after all and was just looking for an excuse not to talk to me anymore?  I understand that people have preferences but come on!  Don’t just sit there and point out things about the other person you don’t like, that they obviously have no power to change.

Date Ideas

I was randomly clicking around on the internet today like I normally do, when I came across this list of unsual date ideas.  Some are pretty random, others are just pretty funny and seem kind of fun, so here is the entire list for everyone to see.  Surprisingly enough, I wasn’t even remotely looking for this kind of post when I found this, I was actually looking at some random artwork.

1. Go on a search for as many good climbing trees as possible, climb as high as you both can in all of them, compile photo evidence

2. Go to a major chain bookstore, and leave notes to future readers in copies of your favorite books

3. Have her dress up as a ghost and you dress uup us Pacman. Walk around downtown holding hands, and whenever anyone sees you two, pretend to be embarrassed, and run off screaming “wocka wocka wocka.”

4. Create photo evidence suggesting that you went on an adventure that didn’t really happen

5. Dress up as superherous and stop at least one petty crime “ie. jaywalking, littering….”

6. Build forts out of furniture and blankets, and wage war with paper airplanes.

7. Try and visit as many people as you can in one night, and turn as many things inside their apartment upside down as you can, without them noticing.

8. Go to the airport, get the cheapest, soonest departing flight to anywhere when you show up, and stay there for a weekend.

9. Write a piece of fiction together. Outside at a cafe. Ask strangers when you get stuck.

10. Dress to the nines, pretend to be married, and test drive very expensive vehicles at an auto dealership.

11. Do the lamest tourist thing in your area that you have both secretly wanted to do forever. Have an unabashed good time!

12. In the middle of the night, drive to the beach, so you arrive just as the sun is rising. Have a breakfast picnic, then fall asleep together. Bring a sun umbrella.

13. Drive somewhere unknown and have dinner in a city you’ve never been to. With fake names.

14. Go to a minor league baseball game under the stars. Tell each other stories about how bad you are at athletics. Randomly cheer for both teams. Eat lots of Cracker Jacks.

15. Go around the city with sidewalk chalk and draw hearts with equations inside on random things

16. Walk around a city and perform short silent plays in front of security cameras

17. With camera and pair of boots, make photolog of a day in the life of the invisible man.

18. Walk around the city all night and find a place to eat breakfast at dawn

19. Go to a restraunt and convince the cook to create something completely new for you.

20. Rent a movie you’ve never seen before. Set on mute and improvise dialogue.

So here is the question I pose to everyone out there, but especially the girls.  What do you think is a good activity for a date? (Keep it clean please!)  All I ever hear is “It has to be creative”, then I am left to come up with some elborate way to spend about 4 hours or more.

Dumped… By Someone I Wasn’t Dating… Errr, Wait, What?

Let me start by saying I like the internet.  I like it very much.  It makes me money, it provides me with hours of entertainment, it allows me to contact old friends via Facebook and sometimes I end up meeting someone online and going on a date (Yes a real life date!  Not one on Second Life haha).  Often times before I go on a trip, I will log into my favorite dating sites and talk to some girls in the area I am going to be visiting.  This I think is a great idea, because I can find out about any local events going on that visitors may not know about, or maybe even get the girl to show me around the area and go on a date.  Locals always know the best places to do things, so why not enlist some help?

So knowing I was going to visit some family in Utah (Which is like my second home.  I’m there all the time), I logged on to the site I used the most and did a search for girls in the area I was going to be staying.  When I got the results I clicked on the first person on the list and sent a message asking her where and at what time the local singles ward met at.  Sidenote*  For those of you that don’t know, wards are just another term for a congregation at a church.  About 5 minutes after sending the message, I received a response and it was more than enthusiastic.  She said “Hey there! The singles ward is right down the street from me, so let me know where you are and I can come pick you up and take you”.  I was pretty shocked, but it’s the best response I could hope for right?  After this we talked for a few weeks until I arrived in Utah to get to know each other a little better before we actually met.  Things were going pretty well and we seemed to see eye to eye on pretty much everything, so we decided to go on a date while I was visiting.

When the big night of the date arrived, the plan was she was going to pick me up because I didn’t have a car that night.  As the time for her to pick me up came and then past, 3 hours later I received a text telling me her friend was upset, that she was spending time with her and what was I doing the next day because she wanted to make it up to me. I told her I was planning on going to the mall to get some new shoes and she could come along if she wanted.  She told me that it sounded great and would pick me up the next morning.

The next day came and so did she, about an hour and a half late.  I was as anyone can imagine, frustrated with the whole situation but I am pretty easy going so I didn’t really let it bother me that much.  After the initial meeting, we were off to the mall to get my shoes.  She was nice, but oh my did she love the tanning beds.  How could I tell you ask?  Well, she was the same color as the carrots I ate for dinner the night before.  Looking beyond her carrot-like appearance, she was a really nice person and we got along great.  When we got to the mall she said she wanted to make a stop at Nordstrom’s first to look for something.  Well this something was a bikini and she decided it would be a good idea to try some one and model them for me.  I mean who tries on bikini’s for a guy they just met?  This should have been my first sign things with her were going to go bad.  After trying on 3, she decided that she wasn’t going to buy one and it was time for me to get my shoes.  In total we spent about 2 hours in the mall looking around and talking getting to know one another better.  On the way home in the car, she told me how great I was and how she wanted to spend the entire next day with me.  Her plans were that she would pick me up in the morning, take me tubing down the Provo river, back to her place for dinner, a hike to watch the sunset and then a movie to end the night.  It all sounded pretty good, so I told her I was up for spending the day with her and it sounded like a lot of fun.  On the way back to drop me off, she also insisted that we stop on the side of the road for a snow-cone because she loved them.  I on the other hand, can’t stand them and find them gross.  She for some reason couldn’t believe this and forced me to eat one hoping to change my mind, which it didn’t.  So after this brief lighthearted disagreement, we arrived back at my house and set a time to meet the next day.

Later that night I was at the midnight release of the new Pirates of the Caribbean movie, when my phone started to vibrate from a text message, it was her.  The message simply read “Dear (Insert my name here), I can never see you again.  Something isn’t right and I feel like God is telling me never to talk to you again.  Hope you understand”.  When reading this I was thinking “Was I just dumped via text message by someone I wasn’t even dating?” and “Did she just tell me God decided to have her dump me?”.  At this point I called it good, didn’t bother to respond or ask why and deleted her from the contacts on my phone then and there.  I just don’t get how a can want to spend the entire day with you, then change their mind completely within a few hours.

One more thing, I never did make it to the singles ward that weekend.  I couldn’t find anyone else who knew where and at what time it started, so I ended up at a family one down the road.  Even if I did get the information about where and when the ward was, did I actually want to go and possibly run into this girl again?  Yeah, you’re right, it’s better that I never found out where it was.

*Note: This story ties into another one which is still to come.  Trust me, it’s good.

The Long Drive With No Escape

I have heard that driving long distances with someone you are dating is a good way to get to know them, and it’s true.  I have been on many long car rides with people I have been dating, and I’ve found out lots of things about them I may not have known otherwise.  Although this is a good practice with someone you have been dating for a while, I would not recommend this for a first date… just trust me on this one, don’t do it– no matter what.  I have done it before and while it can turn out well on occasion, for the most part, as in this case I’m about to tell you, you just end up in a car for a really long time, hating life and thinking about how bring single until the day you die seems like a great idea for the time being.

So, as all date stories go, the guy generally asks out the girl via the phone, in person (if you are daring enough), or now it’s apparently ok to ask someone out through a text message which still just seems stupid to me.  So I, being the guy, called up a girl that I had met at a Young Single Adults (YSA) conference a few weeks earlier. We’d been talking to on a regular basis since meeting, so after some discussion I asked her on a date to which she agreed, but she wasn’t  sure about her schedule because she was working weird hours. I said I would call back the next day to set up the time and place.

The next day I called her back as planned and she had some great news for me–she had gotten some free tickets to a musical her friends were starring in. I agreed as the musical was in an area that is very well known for putting on great performances, and there was a free dinner beforehand, so all we had to do was get there.  I thought it sounded great as it was pretty much a free night for the two of us and all I had to do was pick her up and drive us there. Now because of the area I live in, it was an hour drive to her house, and then another hour after that to the place we needed to go.  I thought that an hour in the car alone with her wouldn’t be too bad because we had already had great conversations and I hoped that that would just continue in the car.  So, despite my own rule not to drive long distances on first dates, I agreed and it as off to the dinner theatre that weekend.

The date got off to a slow start.  She was only 20% ready by the time I arrived at her house to pick her up and I had to wait alone staring at a wall for 40 minutes while she got her things ready to go.  I mean, sure, I can understand if she is running a few minutes late, but 40?  That is a bit long for me– thanks. Nevertheless, I decided to let it slide and not ruin everything over having to wait for a bit.

So, after my wait we finally got into my car and on the road for the trip down to the theatre.  The ride there was honestly great. We had a great conversation and discussed all kinds of interesting topics.  The long drive flew by like it was only 10 minutes.  As we were waiting to pick up our tickets and get in the theatre to find our seats afriend of the girl I was with came up and started talking to us.

…this is where the date goes bad.

So, as I was standing there with my date and her friend, their chat moved on about people I didn’t know and things that were happening in their lives. Instead of just standing there staring at the two of them while they talked, I started to look around at all the posters and signs about the other shows that were going on in the area.  Once I turned my back, two seconds could not have passed before I heard something that ruined the entire date.  You know when people whisper too loud and everyone can hear them?  Well, someone should probably fill these ladies in because here’s a little secret: turning my back doesn’t mean I still can’t hear you talk about me 2 feet away in your half whispering voice.  Here is the conversation:

Friend: I thought you already had a boyfriend?

Date: Yeah I do and he is so hot and sexy.

Friend: Then what are you doing here with this guy then and who is he?

Date: Oh, well the guy I am with wants to have sex really bad and I can’t because of my religion. We are supposed to wait until marriage and this guy (referring to me) goes to my church and I know he won’t try to sleep with me tonight, and I needed a ride down here for the show because this is the last night it is on.

At this point my friends told me I should have said, “Hey, I forgot my wallet in the car, I’ll be right back” and just left her there to find her own way home. I have to admit I did think about it, but I’m just not that guy so I said nothing and went into the show.

Once we found our seats we were informed that we had missed the dinner by about an hour (remember the time I spent waiting for her to get ready?) and that for the rest of the night they would only be serving drinks.  So there I sat, hungry and pretty upset about being used as a taxi service because the other boyfriend didn’t have a car.  When the show finally ended we were both very hungry as we didn’t eat dinner so it was off to find somewhere to eat.  Now I know what you are all thinking, why didn’t I just call her out and call it a night? Well, it was a long drive home if you are fighting with your passenger and also I was really hungry and wanted something to eat before my 2 hour drive home.  So, after a short walk we found a place to eat where I ignored the fact that I was just a taxi ride and tried to have a civil conversation.  When the bill came, she opened her purse and said “Oh, I forgot my wallet”.  By now the night was just beyond ridiculous–not only was I a taxi but I was also Unicef and paying for her meals.  I mean, don’t get me wrong, I am not a cheap guy by any stretch of the imagination, but this was different.  I pay for almost all of my dates and have no problems doing so (it’s the way I was raised, like opening doors for girls, etc), but if you already have a boyfriend and expect me to pay for everything, you are pure out of luck.  I sat there in disbelief at what I was hearing and just paid for her dinner and headed straight for the car to get home as fast as I could.

The car ride home was awkward to say the least.  I am pretty sure she knew I was on to her by this point, so the conversation died and an awkward silence filled the car.  Fortunately she fell asleep, or at least pretended to which saved me from having to come up with conversation topics other than, “So I hear you have a boyfriend that is super hot and wants to sleep with you really bad”. Finally the night came to an end when we finally reached her house.  Being the gentleman that I am I still walked her to her door to say goodnight, expecting nothing more than a hardy handshake and a “I never will return your call again so don’t bother trying” from her.  To my surprise I got a hug with, “Will I see you around?”. To that I replied, “Probably not” and then promptly turned around and drove home, never to see or talk to her again.

The Search for Happiness

Like most single people out there, I am looking for that speacial someone to spend the rest of my life and beyond with.  Being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, there are many programs and activities set up for young people between the ages of 18 and 30 to attend to get to know one another and eventually get married.  Over the years I have been to so many activities, confrences and other events that I have lost track of how many I have actually been to and how many miles I have driven.

Over this period of time I have met many people and been on a lot of dates, dates that have gone horribly wrong and seen people go from sane to… well… you know what I am talking about.  So I thought to myself that I was doing the general public a disservice by withholding these stories (or I like to refer to them sometimes as, epic tales of woe) and with that, we have the birth of this blog.

So sit back, relax and enjoy the stories of my dating life in my search for happiness.